Where should we buy from?/Is Pluto a planet?

Midnight. It’s the classic time of superstitions, legends and traditions. Kiss your lover at midnight, you stay together; the barrier between the spiritual world and ours is thin at the stroke of midnight; the wolves howl at midnight. But what is the scariest thing at midnight? Not having a dealer! For Billy and Ryan, that’s the exact problem they have at this midnight hour.
 Billy sat in the rocking chair of Ryan’s living room. The circular fan scanned the room, at times grazing the big man. He shook his head with a frown on his face. His fingers drummed on the armrest with fiery impatience.

 “Come on dude. Call someone.”

 “Mark always played the middle man and you went and pissed him off.”

 Ryan was pacing in front of him, the TV was off and to Billy it was the only form of entertainment at the moment. Billy rolled his eyes, “Ashley came on to me.”

 Ryan stopped in midstride. “It’s still your bro’s girl. Well not anymore. He hates you and she dumped him.”

 “Don’t act all high and mighty, Ryan. You fucked her too.”

 “That was after she dumped Mark.”

 Billy’s jaw dropped. “You fucked a preggo? You lucky duck.”

 Ryan smirked and just shrugged.

 “So you can’t just call Mark?” Billy pleaded.


 “How about your sister?”

 “How about you call YOUR sister?”

 “I don’t like my sister.”

 “I don’t like your sister either.”

 Billy tilted his head and winced. “I need to get stoned. My head still hurts.”

 “I think we should have taken you to the hospital. I think you have a concussion and being as stupid as you are—“

 “I know who we can call,” Billy interrupted.



 “Hell no.”

 “He’ll get us something,” Billy beamed.

 “Billy, he stole an ostrich. I am not buying from a guy who gets THAT high.”

 “When he steal an ostrich?”

 “You don’t remember? He had it in his backyard for a week. Then it escaped.”

 “Oh right… that thing fucking head-butt me.”

 “You punched it in the face!”

 “I… did I?” Billy leaned back and pondered (hard to think, huh?).

 “I’m not calling him,” Ryan repeated. “I just want to get high and relax. He’ll get us something that’ll put you in a coma, make your science test sprout legs; birds follow you in the bathroom or think you found the 9th planet in your backyard.”



 “You said 9th planet. There are 9 planets in our solar system. Planet X is the 10th and we don’t know where or what it is.”

 “Pluto isn’t a planet anymore.”

 “Yes he is.”

 “No he, I mean it, isn’t.”

 “Now you’re just being rude. Mickey’s dog is the namesake of the 9th and last known planet.”

 “Where have you been? Pluto hasn’t been—wait, it wasn’t named after Mickey Mouse’s dog!”

 “Uh-huh. Pluto! Name another dog named Pluto.  I dare you.”

 “It wasn’t a dog.”

 “Therefor it’s named after Mickey’s doggie,” Billy smiled widely. “Now call Krystian. I forgot his number.”

 “Fine, but you’re paying him,” Ryan picked up the phone. “This goes against my better judgment.”

 “Ashley said the same thing.”

 Ryan paused. “You didn’t sleep with my girlfriend, did you?”

 “You have a girlfriend again? What happened to Lizzie?”

 “Lizzie is my girlfriend!”

 “I thought Betty was.”

 “Who’s Betty?”

 Billy shrugged, “That is what I been thinking.”

 Ryan thought for a second. “You mean Sara-Beth? Long black hair, nice ass, stripper at Diamond Dolls and huge daddy issues?”

 Billy nodded, “Yeah that’s the one.”

 “Dude, that’s your girlfriend.”

 Billy’s jaw dropped. “So that’s why she’s been calling me.”

 Ryan hung his head. His phone rang in his hand and made him jerk back. He quickly answered it, so his mother wouldn’t wake up. “Hello?”

 “Ryan the Stallion!” yelled a familiar, yet haunting voice. “You want what I got?”

 Ryan extended the phone to Billy. “You talk to Krystian.”